Evil genius Karl Rove has launched yet another mustache twirling-worthy scheme. As dastardly as ever, this time, he’s put our beloved solar system on his electoral map. C’mon guy, we all want to get to Mars, but this manipulative plan-hatching is waaaay too obvious. Maybe they should wrap that “Mission Accomplished” banner around Bush’s torso like a Miss America sash as he announces the space initiative.

Rove would do Machiavelli proud. (He re-reads The Prince every year, btw.) Happily, I smell a right-wing downfall in the not-too-distant future. Rove’s sun, Venus and Mercury are placed in Capricorn, and cosmic ass-kicker Saturn is giving them a bunker-buster run for their money this year. We’ll be watching his Mercury closely, as Rove is the administration’s messenger. (Well-known for his vicious “whisper campaigns”). But June doesn’t look to be such a glory-filled month for the man behind the curtain. And Bush the Younger’s chart ain’t lookin’ too healthy come this summer, either.

Soon we’ll take a closer look at GWB’s chart, and also, Dr. Dean’s.